An almost same-sex marrige in Delhi in 1880's

This amusing incident is mentioned by Rev. G. A. Lefroy, the Head of the Cambridge Mission at Delhi during the 1880's, while describing part of his duties in a paper written in 1884*. Among his other responsibilities Rev. Lefroy was the marriage-registry-officer for the native congregation in Delhi. As he puts it -

I ought perhaps to make a slight exception in my own case, for I have recently been entrusted with an office which involves the outlay of some little time and thought, though I fear it scarcely receives so much of either as it deserves considering the magnitude of the interests involved. The office to which I refer is that of marriage-registry-officer for the native congregation in Delhi, by which I would have you understand nothing in the most remote degree connected with the celebrant of secular as opposed to religious nuptials, but a kind of central confidant for all the eligible young persons of both sexes in the neighbourhood to whom they may entrust, together with a short statement of their personal advantages, their hopes and longings with reference to the married state, and whose effort it is to arrange and bring to completion such unions as may seem to contain the greatest promise of a long and happy domestic life. The office is perhaps a somewhat peculiar as well as delicate one, and for the relief of any of the weaker brethren who may find in this a singular outlet for monastic energy, and it may be even stumble thereat, I may perhaps explain a little further the circumstances out of which such a state of things have arisen. The problem is in reality a simple one. One of the very first and chiefest aims in life of the parents here, I allude, of course, more especially to the class of which I am at present speaking, is to secure betimes the suitable betrothal of their children. I say betrothal, because it is in this country a ceremony wholly distinct from marriage, and often preceding it by many years, taking place at any age between two and twelve years old, earlier perhaps, but not later without very grave reason or incurring the risk of serious responsibility. The conditions of such suitability in the mind of the anxious Father are chiefly three, (a) That the parents of the other child should be living, or failing this, that there be some other responsible person able and prepared to undertake the expense of the marriage feast, etc.; (b) that the partner selected be, if possible, lighter, at any rate not darker in colour than his own offspring; and (c) that he or she come of a stock not only unconnected by blood with his own, but even without the slighter, and as it would appear to us not wholly undesirable bond of friendship or even casual acquaintanceship. It is on these lines that I have to work, and the method of action is not difficult. I enter in a book the names of all children for the disposal of whose hand and fortune no other engagement has already been made, and whose parents express their wish that such should take place by Christian rites, and then, whenever a father intimates to me that he is desirous to conclude a betrothal for his olive-branch, I try to select a partner, fulfilling as far as possible the above conditions.Sometimes negotiation is required to carry a proposed engagement to a successful issue.

He then describes the faux-pas, same-sex marriage not being a favorite dish then in India, or even now for that matter-

This was notably the case in one instance which occurred some time back. An engagement had been suggested between two parties who seemed in all respects suitably matched, the age especially being all that could be desired, as the boy was eight and the girl six years old, but unfortunately the boy's father, who lived in a village a little distance from Delhi, and had some difficulties about accepting exclusively Christian rites, hung back. I arranged to go and talk the matter over with him, but so serious did his objections seem in the mind of those who knew him best that, on the day in question, I was deserted by all those who among our little Daryaganj flock are usually my heartiest supporters in these simple and earnest efforts for the domestic prosperity and happiness of our Christian brotherhood, and left to bear the brunt of the battle, and probably the burden of defeat, alone. Nothing daunted I girded myself up for the task, summoned the whole male population of the village, for I need scarcely explain that these are matters of absolutely general interest, in which every 'bhai' or member of the caste has an almost equal vote with the father, and urged my case so vigorously that in a couple of hours' time a successful issue was reached, and the engagement there and then (in the absence it is true of the girl, but of what consequence was that?) formally completed. This piece of successful diplomacy brought my fame as a match maker (if a word of so questionable a character can be applied to functions so pure and lofty) up to fever heat, and applications for engagements flowed in apace. Unfortunately amid this press of business an accident, such as may occur in even the best managed institutions, happened, which, for the moment at least, caused a complete reaction, for, by the slightest clerical error in the entry of the names in my book, I almost succeeded in bringing together in the important betrothal rite two young persons, admirably matched in almost every other respect but both, by an amusing coincidence, of the male sex. For a time this unfortunate incident, causing as it somehow seemed to do a most unfavourable impression, completely stopped the run on my office, but I have little doubt that by renewed efforts and a still more scrupulous attention to even the slightest wishes of my clients my previous proud position may be before long regained.

(emphasis mine)

  Same-sex marriage - not here buddy!  

Do excuse the title of this post - it is, of course, much exaggerated to catch your attention, like all good advertising and all insincere political promises. But the read was worth it, admit it!




*The leather-workers of Daryaganj   by the Rev. G. A. Lefroy, M.A., Cambridge Mission, Delhi, 1884